Re-Entry

July 16

Today was a post-vacation recovery day. Yesterday was chaos inside me. A week's vacation left me feeling anxious and unwanting to come home. Not the typical "aw man, do I have to start setting an alarm again?" but a deep, dark and uncomfortable feeling of not wanting to go back to real life. Not wanting to return to work. To the house. To normal. My dear friend Abby named it for me--she called it re-entry. When you are edgy and quick to be angry for no reason. When you're mad at your partner for reasons that have nothing to do with your partner. When you get in a fight in front of your parents then don't talk or look at each other during a whole meal, then realize the fight isn't at all what the fight was about (after a 40 minute walk to "water the garden").

So, today I recovered. Our re-entry was cushioned by a warm meal on a friend's back porch, then a warm fire and good conversation. Today I woke early (yes, to an alarm) for a walk with a friend and some catching up. Then time at Open Space watching Graham barista for the masses (or the few regulars who he knows by name), while catching up on email and blogs. A walk along Hawthorne, to Cool Cottons then stocking the fridge and buying stakes to support our tomatos which grew 3 feet (I swear) while we were gone. A bike ride downtown, where I may or may not have thumbed through 5 crafty books at Powell's while enjoying an iced coffee and a pretzel. Topped the night off with yoga, and now I'll bottle some beer with my husband. Re-entry is complete.

And I still get another day before re-entering the workspace. I can't complain. I really can't complain.